Friday, September 28, 2012

School Update

It's another exciting Friday night in this house. It's hard to believe that my Friday night has came to dinner, 1 Barney show, bath and bed time, catching up on some of my favorite blogs and maybe a glass of wine.. Gasp... Oh I forgot Pinterest... Add it in with the wine. I'm a multi tasker like that.

But the truth is I wouldn't want it any other way.

Lynlee's first day went great. She came running out when we got there and gave me a huge that melted my heart.... And she was so excited to show me her project for the day and what she had done.
And then she had school again yesterday. She was too cute. We took her in she ran up the stairs to her room, hung her backpack on the hook, ran into the room, we told her we were leaving, she ran out, kissed us and ran back in. And when I say ran I mean RAN... She acted like this was her 2nd month, not her 2nd day. I love it!

She might be the cutest thing I've ever seen... Just sayin
She talks alot about her friend anna (hannah) snack time and singing.. lol. Even thought she has a snotty nose and tried to eat out of her plate without silverware I know it was the right decision to make.



Wednesday, September 26, 2012

First Day of School

As most of you know yesterday was supposed to be Lynlee's first day of school. She started a program at a local church for 3 days a week 3 hours a day. Monday evening we packed her backpack (i might or might not have cried the whole time) picked out her clothes and was excited about her first day. Well yesterday morning around 6:15 she woke me. She had a temperature. It definitely put the first day among other things on stand still.

We went and got a copy of her labs from Monday (perfect by the way) and then headed to the pediatrician. I was afraid her tooth might be getting infected or something. She checked out fine and and the one fever was the only one she had. The tooth looks gross. I hear it looks normal but it grosses me out to no end. But anyways... She actually had a weight gain for this check up.. I was excited for that..

We kinda planned on school today but wouldn't be sure until this morning. I wouldn't send her if she spiked again. But she didn't. She was up and ready to go this morning..

I'm not going to lie when we left there were tears.. But they were mine not hers. She hugged and kissed us and went to play with the other kids. I was so relieved. I don't know if I would have left her crying or if I did it wouldn't have been pretty. I was so scared for her. She's never been left alone with anyone other than family. I'm still scared but I'm sure that's normal and  I hope she does well the rest of the time.

I know I'm rambling. I don't have much down time and when I do I have no clue what to do with it. Brody isn't here. Ryan's asleep and Lynlee's at school... So I'm blogging... Rambling.. etc...

I'm sure there is laundry calling me name somewhere.. lucky for you guys...

Happy  Wednesday.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Never a dull moment.

Taken yesterday :)

There's never a dull moment in this house. I'm sure it's true of everyone who has a house of kids, pets etc.. but if life was ever boring I wouldn't know what to do. I'm not sure I want it to be boring but a little less exciting would be awesome sometimes..

Tonight we went from this.... Smile snap some pictures...

To Lynlee be careful you might fffff..... as the words left my mouth she was down on the floor..

Ryan came running is he she okay? Me.. I don't know she is bleeding.. It's amazing that everything we've been through the only times I've been sick is when there is blood involved. When she busted her lip in Pittsburgh I had to sit down while Ryan took care of her. When Ryan was in his car wreck I had to leave the room.. And tonight I was getting sick when Ryan was trying to see where all the blood was coming from.. I finally looked down and said. OMG where is her tooth.. Lynlee was done crying at the point. She was busy playing with the sink while the thoughts of one front tooth is running through my head... Yes I'm obviously self absorbed but Really?! a front tooth... Have we not been through enough...

But she's a trooper. Hasn't complained once... The bleeding wasn't as bad as I expected even though she is on an aspirin still. Her gum looks terrible and her lip is busted but she will be fine..

We do head for labs in the morning.

I think we are ready for school. We got her a backpack yesterday and I have all her stuff filled out ready to go. I'm sure you'll get a blog on Tuesday of how her first day went and how much I sobbed, drank, etc...

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Speech, school, one hot mess...

I really wanted to blog last night. But for some reason time slipped away and I got lazy... So you get two post in one.

As most of you know yesterday was THE SPEECH... The presentation is probably more accurate but I had worried and worried about it for months. I had practiced it three times (only once in front of a real person, Ryan) and I just went with. It wasn't as bad as I thought. It's obvious I'm not the best public speaker and there wasn't anyone trying to hire me for my speaking skills but I did it. I got up in a room full of people and told our stories. Told Lynlee's story. Going back three years is hard. I don't like relieving those days. Those first days of worry and fear. But I did it. I think the presentation was ok and I'm proud of it. I got to tell the story. It promotes organ donation and makes people aware of Urea Cycle. and ultimately if one kid gets care coordination and is better off after this then my part is done.

As hard as the speech was it didn't amount to half of this morning. We had speech therapy and then went to check out Lynlee's preschool. She will be starting Shining Star on Tuesday and well I'm a mess. I cried all the way home, cried for half the morning, and hell, I'm still crying typing it. And she didn't even start yet. I know it will get easier after the first few years weeks  days. I think she will do amazing there. She LOVES kids and already knows one little girl in her class. I think she will excel in learning and I'm hoping she does the same in speech...

I know it's selfish and wrong of me to not want her to go. If I could I would lock her up in the house forever and never let her leave until she was 40, 35 30? Well married, with kids... and then I'll move in with her to be the Nanny. See I have it all planned out.  But all jokes aside we've fought so many battles and beaten so many odds that I just don't want to let her out of my sight. I know that all mothers cry the first day of school, that it's not easy on anybody, but I'm just not ready. I'll never be ready.

Time doesn't stop, kids grow up. It just seems unreal that the baby I was talking about yesterday the one the doctors said wouldn't make it.. The one I wasn't sure would see a 1st first birthday, the one that got a new liver and was the poster child for it..... is going to pre-school next week...

Yea, I told you I was a blubbering hot mess...

So I'd better go wash my face and get one with the day so that I can follow her around like a puppy...

and job hunt. I obviously need out of the house more.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Wordless Wednesday: Daddy couldn't be more proud

If you see this Tuesday just pretend it's already Wednesday. Tomorrow is going to be busy and I wanted to make sure I got this posted.

Monday, September 17, 2012

If you really knew me

If you really knew me you'd know........

  • water is the only thing I drink except one cup of coffee most days of the week. I drink 64-100 oz of water every single day
  • Ryan has been the only guy I've ever loved and I've never had my heart broke!
  • I never wanted kids until I met Ryan... and now I'd give anything to have one more "healthy" one.
  • I don't like other peoples kids or pets. There are a few exceptions to this... But NOT many.
  • I love frozen grapes in my wine and not ice cubes!
  • I've had one best friend for years.... 1 best friend and now 3 sisters is all I need!
  • that I probably have OCD. I can't stand for my floors to be dirty or clothes to be in the laundry basket.
  • I can be home all day and never turn on the TV, but don't take my Internet!
  • I have no filter.. unless there is a backspace button..
  • My language is filth. I'm actually afraid of what Lynlee will say when she talks.
  • I would skip a meal or a days worth of meals for ice cream!
  • I had no idea what I was going to blog about when I set down.
  • that the days where I blog about me are few and far between

Saturday, September 15, 2012

It's time

It has been such a productive Saturday for me.

1. Worked on my speech for next Wednesday.. Yes it's already here! (and I could still throw up just thinking about it) but I will do it!!

2. Worked on my resume. I hadn't done that for over 3 years. Wow..

3. Looked into some preschool/ programs for Lynlee..

4. Laundry, cleaned the floors, dishwasher, etc, etc, etc.....

Yes, It's still me.. Stacy... No one has hacked my blog. and you read both 2 & 3 correctly...

It's been an emotional week with lots of big decisions made around this house. But it's time.. It's time for me to get back into the working world again. Even if it's just part time.. And it's time for Lynlee to be around other kids.

For the past few weeks I've felt suffocated, trapped, bored really.. I've been home for 3 years now and it's time move on with life. Lynlee doesn't need me like she needed me in the beginning. We made the hard decision to transplant Lynlee so she can live a normal life and it's only fair for her to do that. Not to be trapped in our house for days on end because she might get sick..

When I resigned from my job it was because it was what we needed at the time. I needed to be home and take care of Lynlee. We chose to sacrifice many things so I could be home. I'm honestly surprised we've made it 3 years on one salary alone. It hasn't been easy, but now it seems a little like nonsense to live like this. We have to do what's right for us, for Lynlee and for our future.

So on Monday I'll be actively job hunting. And we will be looking into some part time programs for Lynlee to be involved it.

I'm excited! Nervous, scared, but excited....

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

It's still Wednesday

It's almost 10pm on Wednesday but it's still Wednesday.. I didn't have any pictures other than one for today so I snapped a few throughout the day..

This picture was taken yesterday morning before labs.. We had repeat labs this week because Lynlee's liver labs were a little high last week due to the diarrhea and fever from the weekend before. But they are back down and look great. We are still waiting the prograf level and I'm hoping she gets a few weeks off from needles.

Other than that things are going along smoothly... Ryan is working a few new shifts for the new few weeks so we've been adjusting to that.

Lynlee's telling Brody... Shhhh Daddy's sleeping
We did pull out the high chair this week. I know there was pictures on of Monday but these cracked me up today. At one point Lynlee had all the toys on Brodys' lap and by the time I got the phone out he was not happy with her.
His facial expressions kill me!!
So Happy Not so Wordless Wednesday or what's left of it. We are off to speech therapy tomorrow and I'm sure I'm more excited than Lynlee to show off her whistle blowing for Miss Erin. 

Monday, September 10, 2012

Happy Monday!

Some Mondays plain out stink around here. It seems like between Lynlee and sometimes Brody adjusting to the new schedule following the weekend there is A LOT of drinking crying, screaming, meltdowns around here. And Don't even get me started on how the kids act! HAHA. Kidding.. (sorta)

But today wasn't bad. I'm actually still in shock on how well it has went. Watch out tomorrow!!

But here's a few pictures that have made me smile today!

I have NO idea why her pants are down! HA!

Hey Brodes, whatcha doing up there??
So that's my Monday.. With some laundry, cleaning, cooking, etc.....
Happy Day everyone! 

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Weekend Recap

This weekend really wasn't too exciting. We didn't have a lot going on which is a good thing. I love waking up and having NOTHING to do all day. Drinking coffee, watching morning TV with Lynlee, being lazy.... Yes those are my favorite days.. So that's what Saturday was consumed of plus it rained all day so it worked out great. By 1pm Ryan and Lynlee were doing flip flops, back flips and head stands in my bedroom. Yes I have a video you guys would LOVE to see :) but I'm afraid Ryan might kill me... But you did read that right both were doing all three so you get the idea!!

She climbed up on the bed where the laundry was and picked out two socks of Ryans! HA

Today we needed out. We headed to the County Fair.. And well it wasn't anything to brag about we lucked out and saw the miniature horses do a show! Lynlee loved them!!!


She did ask to ride the train. I was shocked. She never wants to ride anything. Well she got on it, smiling.. And she made on lap and when she saw us I saw her lip start quivering. By the time she came back she was crying. It broke my heart into pieces. Man I love that little girl more than life itself!!

Have a great week!

Friday, September 7, 2012

Blow your whistle!!

I'm not going to lie sometimes its really hard to be around kids that are the same age or even younger than Lynlee. It's very obvious she has a speech delay and other oral delays. Her physical delay has caught up rather quickly but if you take her to the park she still sticks out. She doesn't climb up the the slide by herself or go down it for that. It's not always because she physically can't but sometimes it is depending on the situation.

She'll be three in a little over a month and I could write you a list of thing things she isn't doing and should be but I won't. I TRY so hard not to be that person that compares kids to another. It's not fair to Lynlee. Those kids that I would compare her to haven't been through 1/8 of what she has. They haven't lived in a hospital, they haven't been through multiple surgeries, they don't have a feeding tube, they haven't defied the odds like she has... So I can't compare. Lynlee has always been a kid that does things when she wanted even if she was 100% capable of doing it and she will always be that way.

She's stubborn, independent, funny, and amazing. When I think about how far we've came in 8 months it blows me away. She didn't start eating until April and look at her now. Her drinking is so much better. Her talking is improving. She's attempting things she didn't then. She's trying to use her words, she wants to talk and she WILL...

I'm not sure she even knew what her lips were for 4 months ago. She never had to use them. Never knew to close them. Blowing a bubble was a huge struggle and still is. She loves trains and whistles but couldn't blow on them....

Until today....

These are the days that make me so beyond thankful for the little things. It makes me okay with the fact that we aren't always able to get what we want because I decided to stay home and be with her. We gave up two incomes for one. So I wouldn't miss the little or big things.It makes me not take one single day or thing for granted. It gives me hope. So much hope. It gives me assurance. Assurance that we made the right decision with the liver transplant no matter what our future hold. We will always have worries but who doesn't...

So blow your whistle proudly Lynlee.. Momma is so proud and so thankful for you!

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Monday, September 3, 2012

Labor Day Weekend

The long weekend is almost over and tomorrow is back to normal programming.  We will start it bright and early with blood work and then go from there.

We've had a good weekend. I'm kinda sad to see it come to an end. Ryan was off at 3:30 on Friday and goes back to work tomorrow afternoon. A very much needed family weekend together.

Saturday we went to my grandmas house for a cookout and Lynlee played a little music with her Uncle Tyler.

Saturday evening she got a stomach bug I guess. We were up most of the night with her tossing and turning and then around 5am her fever spiked and her diarrhea started. UGH. That put a hold up on potty training. By yesterday afternoon/evening she was back to herself. Eating and playing etc. It was nice to have a lazy day in her bedroom watching Barney though.

And today we decided to get out for a while. We went to the fire tower. I wish I would have taken a picture for those of you that haven't seen it. But Lynlee climbed all the steps to the top and back to the bottom. She didn't even hesitate once.

A few pictures we took from the top:

We did take a family one but Lynlee's eyes are CRAZY so I'll leave that one out.

Then we did some hiking at the rocks at Bear Haven. Very fun afternoon..

We concluded the weekend with fireworks this evening. Lynlee liked them as long as she was in the truck looking out the window. 

Hope everyone had a nice relaxing labor day weekend also.. (minus the poops!)